It was the middle of a warm night in June. Everything was quiet, a little too quiet. Lucia was nowhere to be seen. She ran away from her home, she wanted nothing to do with it or them anymore. With barely any money, some water and a smartphone, she took the first bus that was driving at this hour. She put her head on the window and fell asleep. All she wanted was to forget her old life. When she woke up about six hours later, it was 8 am and she had no clue where she was. She started walking around the small town. After wandering around for a few hours she got tired and realized she wasn't going to get help this way. Asking strangers in a town you don't know for help could be risky, but it was, after all, her only option. A girl her age happened to walk by and Lucia thought it was her one shot at a safe option.
"Hello, I really need help, I'm lost here, have barely any money, please..." she said nervously to the stranger.
"Um, sure. We can figure something out", said the girl.
Lucia was ecstatic that someone was willing to help her. As the two of them walked around the town, they exchanged information about each other. Lucia learned that the girl's name was Kiara, she's 17 years old and lives here with her dad who currently working abroad. Lucia was curious so she ignorantly asked:
"Where's your mom?"
"We've just met, why would I tell you?" Kiara replied.
"Well everybody has a mom, just tell me, it's not that difficult."
"If I tell you now, will you stop asking me?"
"Yes."
"Well my mom left...I've never even met her."
"That's very sad, I'm sorry..."
Kiara was quiet. They walked back to Kiara's apartment. Even though they had just met, they kind of clicked the more they talked. It felt like they've known each other for a long time.
They entered the apartment and sat on the couch. While they were sitting and talking, Kiara suddenly pulled an orange pill bottle out of the pocket of her shorts. Lucia watched as Kiara put a pill in her mouth.
"What kid of pill is that? Why do you need it?"Lucia asked all confused.
"I don't really know. My dad has a bunch of medicine in his cabinet that he keeps there for himself and my grandma. I know they're pain meds because both got them prescribed. You want one? They make you feel amazing. "
"No, thank you." Lucia said nervously.
"Why don't you tell me about your past?" Asked Kiara sudddenly.
"I don't want to talk about it." Lucia shrugged her off.
"I mean, I told you my mom left me. You kind of have to tell me." Kiara insisted.
"Okay... I ran away from home. My family was extremely Christian and they...and..."Lucia started to stutter and tear up remembering all the horrible memories from that place. Kiara didin't say anything, she hugged her and started caressing her soft, thick, golden hair. Lucia apologized many times for crying so embarassingly. As she cried, she felt something she had never felt before. Was it connection, happines, love...? She had no clue , but she liked it: She finally found the courage to speak again.
"My family was extremely Christian, they didn't really like me because I was a girl, they preferred my brother over me. Forcing me to go to summer camps and spiritual retreats with all the loonies and crazy-talk people made me really stuggle with my mental health. I wasn't allowed to have friends. All the while, my brother had all his summers free!"
"I don't know what to say... I'm sorry."
"It's alright."
"Do you want a pill now?" Kiara asked with a stupid smirk on her face."
"I just had to remember everything, so sure."
Lucia had the pill in her palm, put it in her mouth, and swallowed it. It didn't really have a certain taste, but after some time the effects started kicking in. They just sat on the couch laughing like idiots as they took more pills. Three hours passed without them realizing. It was 8 PM:
"Are you tired?" Kiara asked but got no response. Lucia had already fallen asleep.
"I guess I'll go to sleep too." Kiara muttered to herself.
They both slept on the couch until 3 PM. The effects of those pills really did hit. All Lucia and Kiara did all day was lay around doing nothing. Until 9 PM when Kiara asked:
"Want me to take you somewhere?"
"Sure, I did miss out on a lot of things."
They walked down the neighborhood until they reached a club called "The Night Scene" Kiara greeted the bartender and asked for her "usual". Lucia said she'll have red wine because "It's Jesus' blood so it's not as bad." They drank, danced and had fun at the club. Lucia drank way too much and started stumbling and feeling dizzy. Kiara saw that it was too much for Lucia, so they went home. Lucia fell asleep as soon as she got to the apartment.
Next morning, Lucia woke up to the pleasnt smell coming from the kitchen. Kiara was cooking something. Lucia got up to go sit at the table.
"So how was last night? At The Night Scene?" Kiara asked while still cooking.
"Oh. My. God. It was amazing! I had so much fun dancing and the cocktails were so delicious. I really missed out on a lot." Lucia blurted excitedly.
"I knew I needed to show it to you."
Kiara finished cooking the eggs, and as soon as she put them on the table, Lucia started devouring them.
"Chill out, the food's not going anywhere." said Kiara.
"What do you know? I've barely had anything to eat since I left home, just let me enjoy this." Lucia mumbled through the munching.
"Whatever." Kiara said and went on with eating her own eggs.
They finished breakfast and started talking about what they were going to do for the rest of the day.
Kiara noticed they were low on groceries, so she invited Lucia to go shopping with her. They walked to the grocey store across the street Lucia exitedly said:
"This is so cool. I've never been grocery shopping before."
"What? How?" asked Kiara, suddenly stopping.
"I was homeschooled; my parents didn't really let me out of the house often. I mean, I was allowed in our backyard and the retreats, but that's about it."
"That's concerning..." Kiara frowned.
"I know, that's why I'm so excited." Lucia said and scurried off in the snacks aisle.
They finished shopping and as the cashier was scanning their items, Kiara asked for a pack of cigarettes.
"You smoke?" Lucia asked, genuinely surprised.
"Yes, is it really that surprising?" Kiara answered smilingly.
"Kind of." Lucia muttered.
"Whatever." Kiara said as she was paying.
Kiara stopped outside the store to light a cigarette. Lucia looked at the cigarette curiously.
"Can I have one?"
"Sure, here you go."
Kiara lit Lucia's cigarette. After Lucia inhaled the smoke, she started coughing uncontrollably.
"You don't have to smoke, nobody's forcing you." Kiara said as she held in her laughter.
"No, I'll do it. I've always wanted to do something like this."
Lucia inhaled the smoke once again and started coughing. This time Kiara could'n't help it and burst out laughing. This is mostly how the two of them spent their days. Lucia had so much fun with Kiara every day, It was unbeliveable. All they did was sleeping in, clubbing, having so much fun breaking the rules - basically doing everything that bad and rebellious teenagers do. Life felt amazing for Lucia; she got to experience her dream of being a rebellious teen. She also did all of it with a person she loved. One day the two girls were just sitting on the bed talking about life. Kiara put a cigarette in Lucia's mouth and in her own mouth. She lit them together. Their faces were so close to eachother as the faint light from the lighter shone on them. It was a truly intimate, and even, romatic moment. Lucia felt the thing again, the thing she felt when Kiara hugged her the first day they met.
After a while, all the things Lucia had tried started to get to her. She was a different person, even Kiara noticed it. She was angry and annoyed all the time. As time passed Lucia's condition only got worse. Her hair started falling out, her skin got paler, she was always tired and grumpy. She started acting crazy whenever she didn't have her pills or cigarettes with her. Kiara started getting concerned and tried to help, but Lucia just pushed her away. They barely even spoke anymore. Lucia had completely withdrawn herself from everyone and everything. Days have passed and Lucia spiraled even deeper in her problems. Kiara blamed herself entirely. If she had never given her that, pill, never given her that cigarette, would things be different now? Kiara's guilt devastated her. She just couldn't handle it anymore. She got a paper and started writing something. When she finished, she shut the front door and left the apartment. Lucia woke up to a letter on the kitchen table. She started reading it carefully:
"Dear Lucia,
By the time you are reading this, I will already be far away. I feel so guilty for everything I did to you. I've ruined your life entirely. I wish I had never given you a chance to expirience all those things. Everything that has happened to you is because of me. It was devastating for me seeing you in pain every single day and it was even more painful knowing it is all because of me. I am truly sorry for everything I did to you. I hope you get the help you need and hopefully heal. I know this is probably painful for you as well, but it is for the best. For both of us.
Take care.
x Kiara"
Lucia kept reading as tears filled her eyes. Could it really be? Had her only friend abandoned her? She finished reading the letter and started unconrollably sobbing, all the emotions flooded her. She kept trying to convince herself it was just a dream, but it wasn't. This was her reality. She was all alone, once again.
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Six years had passed since the day Kiara left. Lucia woke up from her nightmarish state of mind and tried to get better. Slowly, she started healing. She bravely fought her addictions. Finding solace with her support group friends and a kind family that took her in, she gradually got better. She finished high school and even enrolled in college. Psychiatry to be exact. Lucia is now in her 2nd year of college. Every day, she still thinks about Kiara, still misses her, still wishes she were here. It has been a long time since it happened, but she still remembers it everything vividly, especially how Kiara made her feel - accepted and loved. No matter how long she has to wait, Lucia felt that life would bring her and Kiara back together, as it did, one warm June day so long ago.
.