Honesty has always been more important to me than grades, like a quiet rule I have been living by my whole life. And then came the day that changed everything. It was the day I realized that love has the power to change others and make them honest.
My name is Dylan, and I'm a high school student. I would describe myself as an honest person, a hardworking student and someone who can't tolerate injustice. But I also have a gentler side. I think I'm romantic... even though I've never been in love. But how could I have time for love when I spend all my time studying and trying to get the best grades.
Ever since I started high school, everything in my life has revolved around studying and grades. I've surely been spending too much time studying at home. Studying has has turned me into a kind of person who just sits at home with no life. Just last week I had one or two exams daily. Who on Earth had the idea to schedule the most difficult exams, day after day, in one week?
If a journalist with a microphone was to stop me on the street and ask me: "And, how are you feeling after taking all those exams?", without thinking, I would've replied: "Exhausted!". Honestly I can't wait for the school holidays to begin next week. That will be the perfect opportunity to relax, unwind and prepare for the upcoming exams.
The intense studying stresses me out not only because of the exams, but because of something that is like a huge elephant in our classroom. I'm going to explain to you why I stress myself out so much. It's something called cheating on exams. You can find an explanation of the term cheat in any dictionary. (Yes, I know I'm a nerd for quoting dictionary.) According to the Cambridge dictionary the word cheat means "to behave in a dishonest way in order to get what you want". And there, right there, lies the problem.
Literally, on every single exam, someone in class cheats. At this point, it has become "normal". Those "normal" situations have an influence on my moral and I'm afraid I'll become demotivated for studying and school. Therefore, I became a "philosopher", and all these questions go through my head: is it worth to study so much when someone who cheats gets the same grade as you, how does one fight against cheating...
In my head, there is a never-ending spiral of exam questions from subjects like History, Biology, Algebra, Geography... This listing sounds like that Harrison Ford song from my favorite movie Witness. Although, his lyrics sounded something like this:
"Don't know much about History,
don't know much about Biology...".
I wish I was as cool as Harrison Ford in that movie. The only difference between him and me is that I do know a lot about the subjects he sings about and that I don't know much about the falling in love part.
Today is Friday and the last day of the first term before the holidays. I can tell you that the grades I've gotten so far are quite solid. Of course, those same old cheating stories I heard from other students kept raising my blood pressure. Just a minute ago, in the school hallway, I overheard part of a conversation between two of my peers.
"Man, she didn't catch me AGAIN! I'm going to cheat for the rest of my life!", one of them said.
The other one replied with: "Me too, man! I didn't study at ALL!"
Could those cool-hallway people just stop bragging about cheating for a moment?
I remember back in the day, before I enrolled in high school, I always thought about how I would enjoy during my time at the new school to the fullest. I used to fantasize about being surrounded by like-minded people who were hard workers like I am. I enrolled in the high school which is known for having the best students. Now it seems to me that some students have strayed into this school. I think to myself, if these are the best students in town, then I'm truly disappointed. Anyway, the school holidays are about to start and I don't want to think about this anymore.
My fairly ordinary school holidays were going smoothly. Everything would've remained calm if, at my friend's urging, I hadn't gone to his friend's birthday party.
"Come on, you have to come with me!", he said, "You've been studying hard this whole term and you need to have some fun."
So, I was a friend of a friend at that birthday party. I think I had to explain who I was at least ten times throughout the evening. Even though I was an outsider, I wanted to fit in and be cool. This birthday party outing was like a reward for my hard work, studying and good grades because I haven't gone out anywhere since the beginning of the school year. Just when I thought: "Long live school holidays", everything became a million times better. I spotted her.
It was Monica, the most beautiful girl, not only in my class, but in the entire school.
I couldn't understand what she was doing at this birthday party. If I was a friend of a friend, maybe she was too. I mean, who wouldn't invite her when she is so perfect.
As soon as we made eye contact, we started talking. We were in the same class after all. The conversation initially started in the sense of "What are you doing here?" and we, of course, mentioned school, teachers and exams. I obviously didn't even think of mentioning my stance on cheating on exams because I really wanted to come across as cool. So, I changed the conversation to trending songs and movies.
Every time we laughed at the same time, we would both be quiet for a moment, knowing that there was something special happening between us. When the cake arrived, we sang together. I felt like this could become something special. Based on the look on her face and her smile, I could tell that she was interested in me too. While others were dancing, we stood next to each other and talked. I was interested in every single sentence she was saying.
At the end of the evening, while we were saying our goodbyes, we didn't say much. We just looked at each other and both knew we had to meet as soon as possible.
The next day, I spent a lot of time on my phone. I was thinking about texting her. Her name was glowing on the screen for a while. I was thinking about what I could write her in a text message. I thought about every possible way to phrase it like I was writing an exam. I did not want to sound stupid or too serious. In the end, I decided to go with: "I had a great time yesterday. Would you like to go out for a coffee?"
My heart was pounding as I was waiting for an answer. It seemed like hours were passing even though it were only minutes. When the message arrived I felt like I was about to explode of happiness. In that moment, I knew that last night's birthday party was the start of something beautiful.
It has been a few days since we got closer, and it feels like we have known each other forever. The messages just kept coming and I didn't need to overthink about how I should respond to her. Our coffee dates and walks lasted longer and longer. We were head over heels in love. Even though we didn't mention that all the time, we felt it in every situation. When I'm with her, everything around me moves slower. Like in those scenes with Harrison Ford in Witness.
After the school holidays I came back to school, but this time, I could say that the boy who only thinks about studying and exams is now happily in love and has a girlfriend.
Naturally, we ended up sitting together in class. My heart would beat faster every time she would whisper something into my ear during class or when our hands would accidentally touch. Soon, everyone in class knew that Monica and I were together so, in the eyes of others, I was no longer just student who spends all his time studying.
Before we knew it, it was time to start studying for upcoming exams. I, of course, took it very seriously. I studied every day. While Monica didn't study at all, as if we weren't in the same class. Often, when we were talking, she was either scrolling on her phone or listening to music. I couldn't understand why she was so calm about it. I wanted us to act like a team and to support each other. That's how couples work, right?
When the day of the first exam arrived, Monica was sitting next to me, checking her phone. "Good, it's got enough battery", she sighed with relief, I didn't want to admit it to myself at first, but everything pointed to Monica being one of those students who tended to cheat in exams. I knew that other students probably didn't study as much as I did, but the fact that Monica was one of those cheaters, that was something I couldn't believe. Based on her behavior for the past few days, I knew, deep down, that this was going to happen: Monica would cheat, and I would still be the same nerdy nerd. My only inner reaction was: UGHHHHH!
On that very exam, the worst scenario that could happen to a cheater occurred. During the exam, the classroom was quiet. Only the rustling of paper was heard. Suddenly, the teacher stopped next to our bench. Monica looked up at her. The teacher just said: "Monica, give me the phone! You know very well that phones are prohibited during exams! This exam is over for you." Monica handed her the phone and the teacher took her exam as well.
An awkward silence fell in the class. Now, even the bravest didn't dare to take the short route to a better grade. That day, Monica didn't only get bad grade, but she also lost dignity and the teacher's trust.
Unfortunately, I couldn't save her. I couldn't be like Harrison Ford. After all, she was already in deep mud.
Soon after, I talked to Monica about everything that happened. I knew that she was smart, but I didn't know she had any self-doubt. She told me she was afraid of getting bad grades and that using her phone had saved her many times. She said that she didn't even know how to take exams without using her phone anymore. To be honest, that sentence shocked me. I felt sorry for her after hearing that, so I told her some words of encouragement and said that I believed in her. I calmly tried to explain her, without any judgement, that cheating has been bothering me all throughout high school. I didn't use words such as "you shouldn't" or "that's wrong", instead, I told her why I cared about her. I explained that it was not only about the exam, but the fact that everything she learns now, she would need one day. I told her that I didn't want her to succeed because she cheated, but because she studied hard. I also told her I wanted her to be proud of herself and that acting fairly is something that lasts forever. At first, Monica didn't reply to my words, even though, I saw that my words didn't go unnoticed. "I'm scared", she said silently. "I always think I'm not good enough by myself". She looked up at me and I saw uncertainty in her eyes.
The second exam was already scheduled at school. Of course, Monica and I were sharing a desk. While we were waiting for the teacher to enter the classroom and for the exam to start, Monica sat quietly. The only thing that was heard was her taking a deep breath, like she was making a difficult decision. It seemed like she remembered all the words I had told her earlier. Suddenly she said: "I'm going to try... Without my phone. By myself." In that moment, I didn't know what grade she would get on the exam, but I knew something in her had changed, which was more important than any grade.
Later she told me that, during the test, her phone was somewhere deep inside her bag. Even though she knew it was there, for the first time she didn't try to reach for it. Every answer she wrote on the exam was a small step, but it was hers. At the end of the exam, after she put her pencil down, she felt something new. Pride! For the first time, the exam wasn't her enemy, all thanks to my words of encouragement.
When I looked at her after the exam, my gaze lingered on hers for a long time. In that moment, we didn't need words. We just smiled at each other and that smile was everything.
It was an ordinary school day and an ordinary exam, but for me it was the day I realized that my fight against cheating wasn't because I hate injustice, but because I believe in people, I believe in Monica. When I saw her taking the exam without using her phone, I knew that something important had happened. Not only did she stop cheating, but she also started believing in herself.
Answers to my "philosophical" questions from the beginning have more mature conclusions now. Grades are not always a perfect reflection of knowledge, but our behavior and the choices we make shape who we are. At the start I doubted whether it made sense to study if someone who cheats gets the same grade as I do. Now I know that cheating may bring the same grade, but not the same understanding, and that studying always makes sense because knowledge remains even after the grade is forgotten. On top of that, studying prepares us for life, not just for an exam, and gives us a sense of pride.
That was the day that changed everything, not because we got better or worse grades, but because we became better people.
Now I can finally connect this to those lines by Harrison Ford from the movie Witness: "...but I do know that I love you...!"